Vegan Baby Bonnet: Body-painting with poop and other toddler adventures
Each week, I will be sharing toddler and preschool adventures. I will then end the story with some nutritional and other healing tips for pre-school aged children. My mother makes my toddler a lot of bonnets, so I decided that it was appropriate to name this special weekly series Vegan Baby Bonnet.
Yea, this 22 month old may look innocent, but do I have a story for you.
Last week, I put my daughter down for her usual 1130am nap time. She always promptly falls asleep and doesn’t wake up for 90-120 minutes. No complaints. As a matter of fact, she starts singing the nap song I created as we drive home from the playground. Unlike most toddlers, she actually looks forward to nap time. Weird, but I’ll take it!
However, on June 3 it was a strange nap day. 10 minutes after laying her in her crib, I hear her whining about, “Mama, poop!!!” So, naturally I think she crapped out the pint of blueberries she had eaten at the playground, earlier that morning. So, here was go. Mama thinks she gets to change a blueberry sh*ts diaper.
When I open the bedroom door, in front of me is a naked Eva Luna and the smell of fresh poop. She is whining that she pooped… all over the crib. For some reason only known to herself, she took off all her clothes and her diaper and then pooped every where. She was quite upset and let me know, “Mama poop. Can’t nap.” Apparently she realized that if she wants to take a nap, maybe it’s not a good idea to take off your diaper, poop all over your bed, and then try to lay in it.
And then she got upset that her hands were dirty with poop on them. “Mama, clean hands! Mama, clean hands!” But no, she isn’t grossed out that she had taken the poop and body painted her belly and her arms with it. No, she was just disgusted that the poop was on her hands.
Yea, our parents claim we did sh*t like that when we were toddlers, but no, I refuse to believe it.
So, I gave the little booger a bath and replaced all the sheets and pillows in her crib and she finally took a nap.
Yea, I was irritated, but I also realized that I think I’m pretty lucky that Eva Luna poops about 2 times a day. Lucky because at the playground, I hear parents talk about how their babies and toddlers won’t poop for days. I have trained Eva Luna to eat a plant-based diet that is not only high in nutritious foods, but these foods ensure that she won’t ever have constipation problems. I know everyone is unique in their situation and food access, but I get asked all the time, what I feed her and why she does poop so much. So, here is what I do with her:
Water, water, water. We go to the playground and she only gets water. Lots of it. No soda, no high sugary juice, no hot cocoa.
Kale. Eva Luna eats kale in any form. She loves kale chips and my raw kale smoothie. I highly recommend it. If you’re asking yourself, “How the hell do I get my kid to eat kale”, click here.
Hemp seeds. I make ice cream out of hemp seeds and it’s packed with vitamins and fiber and protein and EFAs. I blend hempseed, water, and banana in the Vitamix blender and then put it in a popsicle mold or throw it in the ice cream maker. My favorite is the Nutiva brand. Here is recipe I used from when my son was a toddler.
Spirulina. I mix 1/3 tsp of Spirulina in a watered down apple juice. The ratio is 1 part water, 1 part apple juice. I only use Hawaiian Pacfica brand. Organic and seems like they aren’t “toxic” like so many others out there. Here is a link to my post about Spirulina.
Pumpkin seeds. She devours raw pumpkin seeds. High in fiber but I also learned that pumpkin seeds are great intestinal cleansers for parasites. Which is essential when she is interacting with toddlers and preschoolers who like to dig in their butthole at the playground and then share the love by touching mouths and eye, toys, etc. Let’s spread the pinworm love! Ewwww.
I minimize Luna’s consumption of refined flour products. And I say no to refined sugar products. These are just recipes for jacked up flora, bloated belly, and constipation.
Speaking of flora, I make sure she gets her probiotics. Soy yogurt seems to be a good idea. Raw fermented pickled veggies are a good idea too.
Exercise. Running around the playground 2 hours or more a day seems to shake things up and make things digest better. I guess it’s like “runners trots”.
Tofu. Well, this is important. Her vegan source of protein is usually tofu. However, I have noticed that most commercially produced tofu has 0% fiber in it. That’s a no no. I have hea